Sunday, 26 November 2023

Morning pages #253

Couldn't sleep because of the electricity and gas. If I'm honest where my anxiety comes from is. 
Number one: relying on other people, I hate that. My fear is the consequences of the other person's response. 

'Is it my turn, who's turn is it,  who paid last'

I realise I forgot about the first part of this, an explanation but I'm just gonna leave it. 

Number two: money, not.being sent in time. Then it takes longer than it needs to get the gas and electricity back on. It was fine today though I sent the message and the money was sent within 40 minutes, I love those days. 

I slept at 8:10 and woke at 10:45. I found a good sleep recording app, so that was on. The only thing I learnt...well a few things I don't snore Srove, I knew that. At least I know I probably do when I have a cold.  Made myself a cup of cinnamon black tea. I slept again at :.. I think a few minutes let's say 10:50 woke at 13:12. It's past 12. but I'm still going to write a morning page because 

14:04 no tea in front of me I slept to my GMM episodes playlists.
...today is a special day. the 27th of November 2006. I met some lifelong friends and my FH but that's (I'm trying to use the word but too much and the word because) between me and you. It's between the one person who actually reads these and him if he happens to come across this one day.
Being with on Get a Life changed my life. Along with the lifelong friends, it also was the day I realised I was not alone. It was the day I got rid of the first chip on my shoulder. It was the beginning of living my authentic self. Of me letting go of control.

(14:17)
13 minutes (wow I thought it was longer) see you when I see you.

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