Morning Pages #79

11:21 am, no nothing in front of me because I’m about to go and make breakfast for the whole house, of which there are 3.

Why? No big reason you know, sometimes you do something just because.

I’m still trying to find my flow with the second book ‘After Time’. It’s 400 and something words right now, and it’s been that way for a week now. I did promise myself I wasn’t going to look at the word count (as much) that’s why it’s 400 and something. I felt this way many times writing the first, so I don’t think this one will any different. I ‘ll get past this hurdle. Maybe I should think about writing other scenes that would probably be a good idea, but I’m not too fond of things out of order.

9 minutes, see you when I see you 

Morning pages #78

10:40 am a cup of hot water in front of me.

I have an appointment at the jobcentre at 1:30 today.

I’m not looking forward to it...I never look forward to it.

I always see my appointments…always worry extremely about them even though it’s always okay.

I always think the worst is going to happen like my work coach will kill me, even though she is the sweetest person alive and that probably won’t happen. It’s not only when I know I’m going to be late(which I won’t be today)

(update: I wasn’t, but it was touch and go)

It’s every time I have an appointment, that’s why I know I need to be done with the jobcentre and also why I know I need to move out. Both of those things probably won’t happen this month or next.

I hope it happens soon.

Eleven minutes, see you when I see you.   

Morning Pages #77 Love life

10:31 am, no drink in front of me, just Graze snacks, came 20 minutes ago. I recently switched from the baker box to the everything box or savoury box. So, I get a lot of nuts in my box. Now actually come to think about it I think that has a lot to do with why I’ve lost some weight, along with the drinking more water habit.

I’ve been thinking about my love life or lack thereof. Who are we kidding as a single woman over 18 I’m always thinking about it, but particularly after watching Buzzfeed’s the truth about being a single woman,’ a few weeks ago. How the media influences and yea. Do I want to fall in love, get married, have kids (in that order) because that’s what I want or because anything else would be unacceptable? Yes I want it, but for me since I don’t know what will happen tomorrow, let alone in 10 years. I’m trying not to think the meeting someone ending as the be-all and end-all. I’m thinking of it as something to tick off my list as opposed to something to complete me, make me whole.

20 minutes, see you when I see you.

Morning Pages #76 Book 2

9:45 am, a bottle of water in front of me instead of tea (it probably won’t become a habit) because I’m trying to drink more water.

It’s been 38 days or five weeks since my last blog post, two days before I posted my first novel ‘In my shoes,’ on amazon. First attempt didn’t go well because it ended up in A4 form. So I had to warn people not to buy it until I got it fixed, I hope no one brought it. I think this is just something I will laugh about in the future. At least now I know what to do with the next book. I started it four days ago, it’s called ‘After Time’.  I think I started the last book around this time too. Don’t want it to take as long as the first. I’m aiming for it to be done this year, but I’m trying not to put too much presser on myself.

30 minutes, see you when I see you