Tuesday, 23 April 2019

Morning Pages #30 unnecessary worry


9: 10am, yes, I did make this pot of tea so that I can write here. Family guy on my DVD player.

People always use the word shy to describe me, which is an accurate description. Also an accurate description,

‘You worry too much,’

I know this, my heart knows this. Believe me, if I could take a pill that could get rid of or at least lower the feeling of worry in me I would take it.
Take my appointment with the jobcentre, I have one every two weeks. It starts around the same time every time. My heart beats faster and everything that could go wrong jumps into my head. I know it won’t because the last time I went it was fine. Even when I am sitting on the bus with 5 minutes to go.

‘I’m gonna be late, I know I’m going to be late,’

I think about something extreme, like my work coach killing me for being (never more than 30 minutes, FYI) late.

Worry just doesn’t have short term memory, well it does but it doesn’t care.
 18 minutes, see you when I see you.

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