10:52 am Tea leaf reading in front of me. Youtube watch list on my Ipad.
Just received a Package from Amazon, it was the phone case I ordered. It has the words beautiful day on It with a heart. Feeling people pleasy, thinking about my universal credit appointment. Yesterday I was thinking...
Tea check: still hot
...that I can't take these things over to 2025. l must have an end to universal credit by 2025. If I see the universal credit appointment in Jan 2025 I will be in my given up mode.
How do I keep going after that? There is no way I won't fall into depression. that. If this is the case, If 1 dont know the truth with my crush situation I dont know how I can keep being positive and waiting. I can't have it still be there, the hope, the images of the future, the Confession of feelings. The daydreams of him turning up to my house with flowered, not without action. I'm sick of being patient. Sick of tarot readings saying things like
'you are the one that got away for him. He that egnored his feelings because he was scared. You were unlike anyone he'd ever met before. He didn't know realise the situation of this connection until now. He is coming back to you in 6 - 9 months. He is planning a good surprise.'
Well you been saying that for 2 years. If he felt a bit of what I felt for him I would know It by now. I mean what is he waiting for. I have loved this man since the 27 November 2006 I have accepted that maybe I need to accept he has never felt the same way. That is the truth from what I've seen. Not only has he never seen me in a romantic way. Now he doesn't even see me as a friend. I am just confusion and I have many questions was he dating someone in 2006?
What made him change his mind? What made him think I didn't feel the same way?
47 minutes see you when I see you
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