Morning page #165 Realistic about my skills.

 I woke at 8:17 am for a job centre/ UC appointment at 9 am. I went to sleep after 6 am so yea, thank you, God.

At 8:31 I tried to order a Bolt

insufficient funds,

Uh-oh, what I do now?

I'll just order a bolt on my mum's phone.

00.21p

Oops, I am going to be late. At 8:55 I had to admit defeat and reschedule the appointment.

This morning page is titled

Realistic about my skills.

If this was 3 years ago I would have worried for 2 hours that I was going to get sanctioned.

10:04 am a cup of (I need to stop calling it fart) Moringa tea in front of me. Family Guy season 11 on Mac. I think disney+ is one of those things I was unsure about but I'm glad I didn't listen to the negative (I mean do I really need another streaming service) Like whenever I start a drawing and think this is not going the way I planned or it looks nothing like the picture. 

That's how I learnt about drawing with your right brain and drawing with your left brain (but that's for another morning page) Or my future husband's true feelings about me. I literary never stopped thinking about those. 

Oh my God, I went off the subject. That's part of the reason I don't like listening to podcasts. Because it never fails to...(damn, what's the word)...off the subject.

Anyway I digress

No.1 I can not push myself beyond what I can do. It was 8: 55 am that's 5 minutes to get to my appointment even if I walked it I would get there an hour later max, I would definitely be late. The only person that could make it would be Superman.

No.2 I am not working for Universal Credit. In a way, Universal Credit is working for me. It's there to help me to make my life a little better. And that's where the reality of my skills comes in.

Telling myself to do better when I am already giving 100% is a level of perfectionism no one on earth can achieve.

17 minutes, see you when I see you.